Dear Hearts,
It’s taken a while to write this, primarily because there have been so many changes in my life and, between the many ups and downs, I’ve been somewhat discombobulated in my outlook towards Avastavé in particular. Even as I write this, I wonder: how many of us even take the time to read anymore? I digress. Perhaps even if this is never truly read, the catharsis it offers me to be able to write is otherworldly. So perhaps this is a selfish act. But to deconstruct the word selfish and its many negative connotations is, I believe, a means to discovering the true meaning of self-love.
After having lived in Dubai for over thirty years, I’m finally in the process of being in a country that has reminded me that beauty often lives in the untamed, the imperfect, and the real. More grounded. More messy. Richer in nature and kaleidoscopic in both its opportunities and its many personalities.
Today, of all days, I felt particularly drawn to write this article because when my web developer contacted me to renew this website, I was reminded of how long I’d been paying to maintain something I no longer used. After finally deciding to close it down, I happened to revisit the website one last time. As I browsed through the pages I had worked so hard to build, with their many compartmentalized sections and nostalgia-inducing visuals, I was instantly reminded of my dream.
The dream of a little boy who wanted, one day, to own his own brand. One that would change the world.
As a 37-year-old man who has recently made a major move, I had learned to shelve that dream for a while because dreams and reality are two very different forces of nature. Both can build, and both have the power to destroy.
Avastavé was born as the dream of a little brown boy who grew up in arguably one of the wealthiest cities in the world: Dubai. It was the dream of a boy who always—and to this day—believed in himself despite what the outside world told him.
Avastavé, though still in an almost ephemeral state of existence, had so many little wins. We were featured on Not Just A Label for our first collection, sold at The Edit store in Jumeirah, and even had an emerging-brand mini showcase. For a while, it felt like it was winning.
That is, until I had to step away from my full-time job and suddenly could no longer fund my dream.It broke me.
I thought this would be the time. The moment I would conquer the world. Alas, in my excitement, I had not considered that pursuing my dream might become an issue for my employers at the time. In my head, the dreams of others had never been a threat to my own. However, as we learn with age, human beings are capable of so much beauty and yet so much that is unkind.
Truth be told, this too would lead me towards another chapter.
It led me to work for an organization so filled with genuine love and light that every day felt like a new opportunity to express myself, alongside a team that believed deeply in the vision of the organization. During this time, I consciously stepped back from Avastavé in order not to jeopardize my primary source of income.
However, today, almost four years later, I came back to this website and was reminded of how dreams can transmute into reality, and how dreams, when loved, can blossom into the most beautiful things.
It took me a long time to make peace with many aspects of my life. Sometimes, when I sit down to post on either my personal Instagram or Avastavé’s, I am reminded of the many joys and pains, the triumphs and pitfalls, that make up a life. Yet there is a powerful presence in my life that emanates from within, and it is the same energy that exists within us all: the ability to love ourselves.
And this doesn’t come from sharing a quote on social media or reading a singular book. It comes from conscious decisions made every day—decisions that eventually manifest into a life that may very well become your greatest accomplishment.
Every day, we are given the chance to build the life we only dreamed of as little children.
And if you do one thing today, I hope it is this: recognize that you are never too late, and never too behind, to start loving yourself. Because love is the eternal spring that never runs dry.
And it is love that brought me back here. To remind me that this website, and its intention, was always that: the dream of a boy who dared to love himself in a world that was intent on telling him he shouldn’t.
love always,
Avastavé by Dmitri Ruwan
Listen to the audio narration of this article here.
